To Twatch or Not to Twatch

I like Twitter. A lot. But I’ve never really understood the thing where you’re watching something on TV and also tweeting incessantly about it throughout the programme. There’s probably an official word for it, but just for fun let’s call it Twatching. You can Twatch with your friends, and through the magic of hashtags and trending, you can also Twatch with likeminded strangers the world over. A good idea in theory – technology uniting people. Except you’ve got to be really good at concentrating and responding in 140 pithy and observant characters the instant something Tweet-worthy happens.

Until yesterday, I’d only ever had one Twatching experience, during last year’s Royal Wedding. It was all a bit much, to be honest; trying to listen, watch, read, refresh, type and Tweet all at the same time was very overwhelming. And on reflection, it was essentially just 3 hours of people tweeting increasingly knobbish variations on:

I heart Wills. He looks so noble. Ooh, Posh & Becks. Her hat is NOT A HAT. Here they come. Pippa’s bum. THE DRESS. I wish I was Kate. *faints*

Last night, however, someone tweeted that Film Four were showing Grease. I dutifully changed channel, and joined the movie at the bit where John Travolta trips over a hurdle. Minutes later, I wittily tweeted how weird it is that Rizzo emerges from the diner toilet eating a Cornetto. Lol. Then, for some reason I clicked on the #grease hashtag to see what the rest of the world had to say. 2 straight hours of excellent Twatching later, I had worked out that there are 3 Golden Rules for Twatching:

·         Only Twatch during things you’re already familiar with. It’s much less stressful when you don’t have to commit your full attention.

·         Don’t get angry about the deteriorating state of society when faced with particularly stupid, unhinged or misspelled tweets. Just channel it into realising your own superiority.

·         Don’t worry about contributing your own pointless thoughts. Just focus on enjoying the pointless thoughts of others.

And in the interest of sharing my own enjoyment with you, here are some of my favourite Grease-tweets. And to all the Tweeters who believed your thoughts were worth typing out into the Universe, thank you all.

There are those expressing simple admiration:

@DaisyCochran Omg I love danny he’s so hawwwwwwwwt.

@GeorgiaGoffin Rizzo is defiantly my favourite

@TeamNiallx i love how the T-Bird’s all walk.

@bythefalseazure Totes lol when Kenickie and cha cha do the shoe face dance

@BriannaxBrownx Danny is just so fit, GET IN MY BED.

The new discoveries viewers have made:

@DaltonBelle When I was little I thought Kenickie had a tiny little insurance document in his wallet. A mini certificate, not a condom.

@LizzyLovesit Cha cha is a tranny I don’t care what anyone says

@nat_hest92 Only just realised they used the term “pussy wagon” in #grease

The ones that have taught me new cool slang:

@yourmumwantsme You can’t help but #retrofancy John Travolta in #Grease

@xMaaanda_ Awky mo ‘want some new music?’ ‘I need some money’ hahaha (NB. Awky mo – awkward moment)

@Leedslass09 This is grand…don’t even need subbies for karaoke! Lol

The serious ones:

@WordsByDoobz I don’t care what culture you’re from, if you don’t like #Grease I don’t trust your taste.

@SafiyaStyles The ending is defo the best but the fact that she changes herself for a guy is just retarded

The poignant ones that speak of deeper issues:

@lillykroll boys like danny will always go for girls like sandy and that is why I will never find my true love #toughlifelessons

@Pablobenson Watching #Grease and mum came in kicking off “what are you watching!!??” She’s getting drop kicked in a mo.

@FrankieMeredith After my near death experience I am snuggled on the sofa watching #Grease and being cooked for

The really stupid ones:

@HollyBaillon_ I would of loved to live in the 60’s!

@laurennjay Is sandy meant to be Australian? I’m a bit confused…

@Louisepemberton Rizzo is my spirit animal

The ones I don’t really understand:

@dakid_online Forget PDC, Mashtown, crips or bloods. Its ALL about T-birds… Ardest gang EVER!!!

@CecilHardbody Does anybody else notice that Summer Lovin in Grease doesn’t actually rhyme from Danny and Sandy’s perspective?

The mildly offensive ones:

@NateeDegnan Sandy woulda got banged hard back in the day.. No doubt about it

@mynameislouise Sandy’s a fucking doughball though.

@LaureenRachel Sandy seems like a right mardy bitch in this!

@Mattbott91 #grease is shit.

The international ones:

@SylviaUs Danny Zuko sei un bastardo che fa soffrire Sandy

@Alba_Bellisario Mi madre hacienda la cena y cantando las canciones de #grease es adorable! Hajajaja

And perhaps my favourite of all, the ones that quote lyrics. Badly:

@jennieparky92 I got chills, they’re electrifying…

@Lorna_TheWanted #WeComeTogether is the best song in #Grease

@FarrenThinks We go together like bama bama doobidy doo do bob

@AliceDunkerley who put the bop in bopshu bopshu bop who put the ram in the ramala ding dong